The Stupidest DEA Slang Terms for Marijuana

Photo by Vortex Farmacy.

For reasons best known to their very strange selves, the DEA recently declassified and released an intelligence report with hundreds of slang code terms relating to just about every drug you can imagine.

Most of the nicknames for marijuana are nothing less than wacky. Some harken back to our high school days; some back to our great grandparents.

Read more at High Times

Agents Arrest Man at Airport after Meth Found in Underwear

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Federal agents have arrested a man in Los Angeles for allegedly trying to smuggle nearly four pounds of crystal methamphetamine in his underwear.

U.S. Customs and Border Protection says the drugs were seized Sunday at Los Angeles International Airport. Authorities say the man, a French citizen, was trying to return to his home in French Polynesia when he was found to have packages of meth hidden in the areas of his groin and upper thigh.

The man’s companions were removed from a plane and their baggage searched.

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Three Brits Admit to Turning Nuclear Bunker into Huge Cannabis Factory

An underground, almost completely impenetrable bunker, was discovered in the United Kingdom where British cops, acting on a tipoff, found a large-scale cannabis factory and 4,000 pot plants.

The police finally rounded up three men who admitted their part in running the bunker-turned-weed-farm.

Using keys found in the men’s possession after their arrest, the cops entered the bunker, where they found it was being powered by over a quarter of a million dollars worth of stolen electricity.

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Yes, Poppy Seed-Eaters CAN Flunk a Drug Test

In 2010, Elizabeth Mort was preparing to give birth. Before she went into labor, the Pennsylvania woman steeled herself by eating a poppy-seed bagel. Because of this, state child-protective services seized the newborn child and placed Mort’s baby in foster care—as Mort’s blood tested positive for opium metabolites.

Yes, a Seinfeld episode brought to life. (Why hospitals feel the need to screen new mothers’ blood for drugs, after eating bagels and delivering babies, is another matter.)

This is a real thing, and it’s a real problem.

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Race Car Drivers, Marijuana Smuggling—and Now More Intrigue

Don Whittington and his two brothers were the only sibling trio of drivers to have ever qualified for the same Indianapolis 500 race. That was 1982.

During those heady years of racing, two of the Whittington brothers—along with two other famous Indy 500 drivers, Randy Lanier and John Paul Sr.—apparently also loved speed boats, barges and small planes… especially the ones full of weed from Colombia, Mexico and other such places.

In 1986, the four Indy 500 racers were all busted in connection with multi-million dollar schemes that funded, or partially funded, high-end racing teams.

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DEA Chief: ‘Marijuana Is Not Medicine… It’s a Joke’

At an event yesterday at the Cleveland Clinic concerning “Our Nation’s Opioid Epidemic,” acting head of the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA), Chuck Rosenberg, stated that “marijuana is not medicine.”

The Washington Examiner reported that Rosenberg said, “If it turns out that there is something in smoked marijuana that helps people, that’s awesome. I will be the last person to stand in the way of that… But let’s run it through the Food and Drug Administration process, and let’s stick to the science on it.”

Note the use of the term “smoked marijuana.”

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Homing Pigeon Flies Ecstasy into Kuwait

One of those quirky stories on Fox News informed us this week that authorities in Kuwait intercepted a homing pigeon that had been outfitted with a little backpack containing 178 ecstasy pills.

Kuwaiti authorities had apparently “tracked” the bird as it flew in from Iraq. A BBC News report suggests the airborne trafficker’s error was to fly too close to a border post, where customs agents were already aware that smugglers were thusly exploiting our feathered friends. (The BBC also says the payload was actually ketamine.)

Both reports say that pigeons have been used before to fly small quantities of cannabis and cocaine into prisons in Latin America—noting one such interception in Costa Rica in 2015 and another in Colombia in 2011. Presumably, in all such instances, the pigeon that was caught represented several that made it through.

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Weed, California Legalizes Weed Sales

Weed, California, is an old lumber town about halfway between San Francisco and Portland, Oregon, remarkable around the world for a painfully obvious reason.

Named after Abner Weed, an auspiciously named 19th-century timber baron who located his sawmill in the flatlands between the coastal range and Mount Shasta—a Cascade range summit that, at 14,000 feet, is the highest peak in California—this town of just under 3,000 souls once boasted the largest sawmill in the world.

Now, Weed, California is the world’s chief exporter of exhausted marijuana puns and cheap sight gags. Visitors and locals alike are subjected to a barrage of obvious jokes and hack allusions that nonetheless sustains the local souvenir trade. 

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Used Clothing Store Gets Surprise Pot Donation

MAPLEWOOD, Minn. (AP) — Someone apparently inadvertently donated more than 100 grams of marijuana when they dropped off some used children’s clothes at a suburban Minneapolis shop.

The Maplewood Police Department posted a photo on Facebook of the surprise donation to the Once Upon a Child store with an invitation to the owner to come in and claim it.

Not surprisingly, no one has come forward yet.

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Demand for Marijuana Trumps Ice Cream

If the United States government would simply allow marijuana to be taxed and regulated in a manner similar to alcohol and tobacco, the population would likely purchase more legal cannabis products than ice cream, according to the 2017 Marijuana Business Factbook.

There is some serious demand for marijuana in the Land of the Free.

Some of the latest data indicates that the need for pot, if you include the underground dealings of the black market, is somewhere around $50 billion. This means there is probably already more people buying weed than ice cream, considering the market for the frozen treat only rakes in a little over $5 billion per year.

Read more at High Times